The Trouble is !

You know sometime you just find yourself pondering the things that maybe you missed out on. I have to be honest and say that I am feeling very demoted at work. Just seems that I can’t see the wood for the trees, hell at the moment I can’t even see the trees for the fog. I really don’t know where I am going now. I have never been a great planner in life. I have a rough idea but that has all it has been a rough idea. Now to some that might seem reckless but I believe there are 2 types of people in this world. Those that plan and those that don’t. Planners are the types who have everything mapped out. I am going to do this and then that and in five years be here with that and such like. The one’s that can actually answer the “where do you see yourself in five years” question. The non planners are more you know what lets see where this adventure takes us. Let’s play the cards as they lie and see where we end up. Both methods have there merits and both pitfalls.

I am now discovering that maybe I feel like the cards aren’t playing for me at the moment. Don’t get me wrong they are good cards and I am only talking about work here. Everything else is going great. I feel that maybe the cards are being pushed in the wrong direction. What the hell am I talking about?? Not sure really but that is how I feel at the moment and that is the problem with my way.

I feel like for years I have been busking this job. When I was a kid if you had asked what career I would see myself in I never thought it would be this. I often think I am not even clever enough to be doing this and have no desire to learn more. Yes I did go to college to learn this stuff and in my early career I was keen and eager but now I am being moved away from it and what I started doing I am finding it a little uneasy. If I had a rigid plan I would be exactly where I wanted to be. However the problem with rigid plans is when they go wrong you are kind of stuck and I have found people like that tend then get stuck in the “What the hell do I do now”.

So that is my thoughts on this Wednesday morning. Where did my dreams do? I think we have them. Mine was to become a pilot, but somewhere along the way it got lost. See if I had a plan I would have maybe achieved that. Instead I got side tracked and pushed around and now find myself thinking about why that didn’t happen. Was it really something I wanted? Am I being dreamy in think that I could achieve that? Who knows and only time will tell.

Hey ho I guess it is time to go. Rice Crispy cakes for all. !!